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Why There is No Such Thing As a Soul Mate

Love at first sight is a common theme in Western film and literature, from the classical Romeo and Juliet to the contemporary Twilight. Beyond these fictional accounts, many men and women claim to have experienced something similar in the real world.

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Interestingly, despite the immense popularity of this idea of love at sucg sight, it has received next to no scientific attention. So is it really a thing?

A happy marriage is a real thing. I promise. Love is an ambiguous word that can refer to many, many emotions. But lets start with the onset of. Don't you care about yourself and love yourself? It makes me sad whenever I hear or read something that people say there is no such thing as love. I believe in . A new book aims to prove that real love happens only momentarily and often between two strangers.

Can you truly fall in love with someone instantaneously? A team of researchers in the Netherlands conducted three tests of love at first sight, which involved an online survey, a lab-based study, and a series of speed-dating events.

In the online survey, adults most of whom were Dutch or German college students were asked questions about their current relationship, if they had one.

They were also shown photos of six strangers and asked to imagine meeting each one in person. They then reported the degree of love and attraction they felt for each individual.

In the lab study, 50 Dutch students went through a procedure almost identical to the online survey, although they were shown a larger set of photos. Lastly, researchers attended three speed-dating events in Germany and the Netherlands where they surveyed 65 people about their feelings of love and attraction following each date.

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Of those participants in the online and lab studies who were currently in relationships, 33 percent said they fell in love with their partner at first sight. Far fewer felt love at first sight for one of the strangers they saw in a photo or met on z speed date.

On a side note, not a single person who felt love at first sight on a speed date had aw feeling reciprocated. People who were physically attracted to another person were especially likely to report feeling love at first sight. In fact, for every one-unit increase on the attractiveness scale, the odds of reporting love at first sight increased about nine times—a whopping effect.

The primary love measure used was based on the Triangular Theorywhich specifies that there are three components to love: On average, those who reported love at first sight scored near the midpoint on all of the love Wives looking hot sex Sharon Springs, which suggests that rather than having strong feelings love, most of these folks felt indifference.

One suh finding worth mentioning is that people who were currently in a relationship in which they said they fell in love at first sight reported the highest levels of love for their partners. Of course, this research has its limitations, including that fact Is there a such thing as love participants were primarily young college students from Europe and most of the data were obtained through surveys.

Society has poured a belief into our minds that there is such thing as a "perfect love," but, in reality, love is never perfect. Is unconditional love obtainable? Some say yes, some say no. Either you love or you don't, there's no such thing as conditional love. A new book aims to prove that real love happens only momentarily and often between two strangers.

As such, more research would be useful, especially research that emphasizes real world interactions. Justin Lehmiller is the director of the social psychology program at Ball State University, a faculty affiliate of The Kinsey Institute, and author of the blog Sex and Psychology.

Follow him on Twitter JustinLehmiller. Read This Next: Sign up for the best of VICE, delivered to your inbox daily. There's only lust.

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